1 00:01:32,926 --> 00:01:35,137 It's perfect for television. 2 00:01:35,387 --> 00:01:38,182 I simply love it, Mindy, and so will Channel 19. 3 00:01:38,390 --> 00:01:41,643 That look just screams anchorperson. 4 00:01:41,810 --> 00:01:44,438 I don't know, Glenda Faye. 5 00:01:45,814 --> 00:01:49,026 Don't you think it's kind of a little too daring? It's kind of flashy. 6 00:01:49,193 --> 00:01:53,488 Now, you know as well as I do that every TV news team has one blond. 7 00:01:53,739 --> 00:01:56,950 Barbara Walters, Rona Barrett, Frank Reynolds. 8 00:01:57,117 --> 00:01:59,828 Yeah, but I couldn't go to an interview looking like this. 9 00:01:59,953 --> 00:02:01,830 My hair feels naked. 10 00:02:02,039 --> 00:02:04,833 Well, maybe that's why blonds have more fun. 11 00:02:05,000 --> 00:02:08,212 Well, I've been brunet all my life and I've had fun. 12 00:02:08,378 --> 00:02:11,173 Have you ever water-skied the Amazon? 13 00:02:11,381 --> 00:02:12,508 No. 14 00:02:12,716 --> 00:02:14,510 Have you ever danced with a Sherpa guide 15 00:02:14,676 --> 00:02:16,887 on the slopes of the Himalayas? 16 00:02:17,095 --> 00:02:19,806 Gone ice sailing with an Eskimo prince? 17 00:02:20,057 --> 00:02:21,767 I can't say that I have. 18 00:02:21,975 --> 00:02:25,062 Of course not. Brunets aren't invited to those things. 19 00:02:25,562 --> 00:02:30,234 And they aren't invited to be anchorpersons, either. 20 00:02:30,734 --> 00:02:34,363 Thanks for the ride, Mrs. Rebozo. Say "hi" to Bebe too. 21 00:02:36,448 --> 00:02:40,035 Oh, no, Mind. Attack of the Bleach People. 22 00:02:40,577 --> 00:02:42,287 What? They turned you into Sandra Dee. 23 00:02:42,496 --> 00:02:44,957 They sucked on your scalp. Oh, no. 24 00:02:45,123 --> 00:02:47,125 Oh, they have. They turned you into Swedish. 25 00:02:50,796 --> 00:02:52,464 Mork, it's just a wig. 26 00:02:52,714 --> 00:02:54,675 I knew that, Mind. May I see it for just a minute? 27 00:02:54,883 --> 00:02:56,385 Sure. 28 00:03:04,560 --> 00:03:07,229 Cold immobilizes them, Mind. 29 00:03:07,813 --> 00:03:10,190 Glenda Faye was trying to talk me into bleaching my hair 30 00:03:10,357 --> 00:03:12,150 for a job interview I have at Channel 19. 31 00:03:12,317 --> 00:03:13,777 Trust me, it'll work. 32 00:03:13,944 --> 00:03:17,739 Well, I must be off to my tai chi class. 33 00:03:24,872 --> 00:03:28,041 That would be very effective against a mugger on tranquillizers. 34 00:03:31,211 --> 00:03:33,255 Well, sayonara. 35 00:03:33,505 --> 00:03:36,216 I learned that on Shogun. 36 00:03:40,262 --> 00:03:42,723 - So how was your day at the zoo? - Oh, it was wonderful. 37 00:03:42,890 --> 00:03:44,850 - More than that, it was two-derful. - Oh, yeah? 38 00:03:45,017 --> 00:03:47,728 I observed all these wonderful, weird animals. 39 00:03:47,853 --> 00:03:49,146 I saw two ants. 40 00:03:49,313 --> 00:03:52,774 I saw a black widow going, "Baby, you ain't coming back here." 41 00:03:53,233 --> 00:03:55,152 I saw a praying mantis. They don't really pray, 42 00:03:55,319 --> 00:03:57,362 they just kind of chant. And then there was... 43 00:03:57,529 --> 00:04:00,407 Oh, and I saw a butterfly and a bird and a dog. 44 00:04:00,616 --> 00:04:02,075 Those are the only animals you saw? 45 00:04:02,284 --> 00:04:04,828 Well, Mind, only the weird ones stick in my mind. 46 00:04:05,078 --> 00:04:08,248 Oh, and I also made a friend at the zoo. His name is Doc. 47 00:04:08,457 --> 00:04:10,125 Oh, great. Does he live around here? 48 00:04:10,292 --> 00:04:12,211 No, he lives at the zoo. He's a chimpanzee. 49 00:04:12,377 --> 00:04:14,379 He lives there with his mother. It was wonderful. 50 00:04:14,546 --> 00:04:17,633 We had this incredible conversation about how Darwin was wrong. 51 00:04:18,258 --> 00:04:20,677 Right, Mork. Well, I'm glad you had a good time at the zoo. 52 00:04:20,844 --> 00:04:22,804 Oh, good, Mind. I can't wait to go back. 53 00:04:22,971 --> 00:04:24,932 Do you have any 50-pound bags of peanuts around? 54 00:04:25,098 --> 00:04:26,350 No, I think we're all out. 55 00:04:26,517 --> 00:04:28,352 Pity. Since Carter lost, I thought we would. 56 00:04:28,519 --> 00:04:30,354 Well, Mork… 57 00:04:40,155 --> 00:04:43,742 You're gonna be all right here, Doc, till we find who kidnapped your mom. 58 00:04:43,909 --> 00:04:47,204 Okay, that's all right. You're not even safe in a zoo anymore. 59 00:04:47,371 --> 00:04:50,165 That's incredible. I mean, they should put bars upon bars. 60 00:04:50,332 --> 00:04:53,794 There you go. Boy, you are tired, aren't you? 61 00:04:53,961 --> 00:04:57,297 Well, we'll find a place for you. Have a little monk nap. 62 00:04:57,673 --> 00:04:59,758 Let's see, we can't put you over there. 63 00:04:59,967 --> 00:05:02,127 Yeah, you can't hang around... What am I talking about? 64 00:05:02,261 --> 00:05:04,429 Mind would be mad if I didn't give you the best room. 65 00:05:04,596 --> 00:05:07,724 Come on, you can sleep in Mind's bed. 66 00:05:08,058 --> 00:05:10,644 Don't be afraid. She's got a life-sized doll of Jackson Browne. 67 00:05:10,811 --> 00:05:12,312 Don't worry. 68 00:05:23,365 --> 00:05:25,158 - Hi, Mork. - Oh, hi, Mind. 69 00:05:25,325 --> 00:05:28,036 Well, I took Glenda Faye's advice and got the hair dye. 70 00:05:28,203 --> 00:05:30,163 I guess the moment of truth has come. 71 00:05:30,330 --> 00:05:32,457 Do I become a blond or do I chicken out? 72 00:05:32,958 --> 00:05:34,626 Mork, I want you to tell me the truth. 73 00:05:34,793 --> 00:05:37,337 If I do this to my hair, do you think I'll lose my...? 74 00:05:37,504 --> 00:05:40,716 - You know, my girl-next-door quality? - I don't know. Ask the guy next door. 75 00:05:40,841 --> 00:05:43,468 The one with the binoculars, who drools a lot. 76 00:05:44,052 --> 00:05:46,430 Oh, what's the big deal anyway? So I become a blond. 77 00:05:46,597 --> 00:05:49,892 It'll all be worth it if I get that job interview. I hope. 78 00:05:50,058 --> 00:05:52,186 While I was at the zoo, something special happened. 79 00:05:52,352 --> 00:05:55,189 Can you tell me later? if I don't do this now, I'm gonna chicken out. 80 00:05:55,355 --> 00:05:57,274 - Oh, it'll keep. - I'll talk to you later. 81 00:05:57,441 --> 00:06:00,485 Okay, one minute. Maybe less. 82 00:06:15,751 --> 00:06:18,170 - There's a monkey in my bed. - It's not actually a monkey. 83 00:06:18,378 --> 00:06:20,589 It's a chimp. That's a common misconception. 84 00:06:20,797 --> 00:06:22,966 You see, there are two groups. The simian groups and... 85 00:06:23,133 --> 00:06:25,344 Would I seem forward if I asked for an explanation? 86 00:06:25,594 --> 00:06:28,764 No, just inquisitive. You see, that's my friend, Doc. 87 00:06:28,931 --> 00:06:31,642 The one I told you about, at the zoo? I sprung him. 88 00:06:31,767 --> 00:06:34,728 Mork, you took a chimp from the zoo last year. 89 00:06:34,895 --> 00:06:36,980 That was different. He was an exchange student. 90 00:06:38,649 --> 00:06:40,359 Mork, you've gotta get him back. 91 00:06:40,526 --> 00:06:42,819 Mind, you don't understand. You really don't understand. 92 00:06:42,986 --> 00:06:44,321 You're being so harsh and cruel. 93 00:06:44,488 --> 00:06:46,532 Mind, his mother was kidnapped from the zoo 94 00:06:46,698 --> 00:06:49,493 and I'm afraid the same men will come back and kidnap him. 95 00:06:49,660 --> 00:06:51,578 Wait a minute. Let me get this straight. 96 00:06:51,745 --> 00:06:53,872 You kidnapped the chimp. You were afraid that chimp 97 00:06:54,081 --> 00:06:56,959 was gonna be kidnapped by the people that kidnapped the chimp's mother? 98 00:06:57,835 --> 00:06:59,962 And they say Earthlings are slow. 99 00:07:01,839 --> 00:07:03,674 How do you get involved in these things? 100 00:07:03,841 --> 00:07:06,969 Oh, Mind, I'm just trying to be a caring, loving person, like you taught me. 101 00:07:08,053 --> 00:07:10,806 Mork, it's still not right to steal a chimp. 102 00:07:11,014 --> 00:07:14,059 Oh, Mind, Mind, Mind. 103 00:07:14,226 --> 00:07:17,104 Now, may I pose a hypothetical question to you? 104 00:07:17,271 --> 00:07:19,147 You're out strolling and lo and behold, 105 00:07:19,314 --> 00:07:22,526 you come upon Bambi in the middle of a burning forest. 106 00:07:23,360 --> 00:07:25,904 Now, here's the question. What do you do? 107 00:07:26,071 --> 00:07:28,407 You either lead Bambi to safety across the river, 108 00:07:28,615 --> 00:07:31,827 or do you baste him in barbecue sauce and have Bambi in a bucket? 109 00:07:35,998 --> 00:07:38,167 Time's up, Mind. 110 00:07:38,333 --> 00:07:40,460 Oh, all right. The zoo's probably closed anyway. 111 00:07:40,627 --> 00:07:43,505 - You gotta take him back tomorrow. - Oh, Mindy, Mindy, Mindy. 112 00:07:43,672 --> 00:07:46,633 I bet in the dictionary it says, "merciful, see Mindy." Oh, Mind. 113 00:07:47,342 --> 00:07:50,470 Mind, you won't even know he's here except for a few more hairs in the sink. 114 00:07:50,637 --> 00:07:53,599 But, hey, don't worry about that. Oh, Mind, I'll take him back tomorrow. 115 00:07:53,765 --> 00:07:55,309 I promise, I really do promise and... 116 00:07:55,475 --> 00:07:58,437 Hey, just think how lucky you are. You get to sleep with him. 117 00:07:59,813 --> 00:08:00,856 What? 118 00:08:01,023 --> 00:08:04,568 Oh, Mind, come on, he's scared and lonely. It's his first night away. 119 00:08:04,735 --> 00:08:06,945 - He's terrified. - Right, Mork. I'll tell you what. 120 00:08:07,112 --> 00:08:09,823 You sleep with the monkey and I'll sleep right here on the couch. 121 00:08:09,990 --> 00:08:12,159 But I gotta dye my hair because I got that interview 122 00:08:12,326 --> 00:08:14,661 at 9:00 in the morning 123 00:08:16,997 --> 00:08:19,708 - He's got on my best nightgown. - I know, Mind. 124 00:08:19,875 --> 00:08:23,253 He had a hard time deciding. He tried on everything in your drawer. 125 00:08:35,641 --> 00:08:37,267 Mind? 126 00:08:40,103 --> 00:08:41,813 Mind? 127 00:08:44,733 --> 00:08:46,276 Mind? 128 00:08:49,738 --> 00:08:52,699 - Mind? - Are we there yet? 129 00:08:53,700 --> 00:08:56,203 Mind, Mind, I'm really sorry I startled you like this, 130 00:08:56,328 --> 00:08:58,455 but, I mean, Doc's hungry. He'd like some warm milk. 131 00:08:58,622 --> 00:09:02,334 - Oh, okay. - Good. I'll go unplug the refrigerator. 132 00:09:05,671 --> 00:09:07,548 Why don't you get him some water? 133 00:09:08,757 --> 00:09:12,010 Oh, Mind, even asleep, you're hotter than a pistol. Thanks. 134 00:09:12,177 --> 00:09:14,596 Water, water. 135 00:09:26,650 --> 00:09:28,861 Doc had the hiccups, so I had to scare him. 136 00:09:33,615 --> 00:09:35,617 - You did that well. - Thanks. 137 00:09:39,746 --> 00:09:40,914 Well, I might as well get up. 138 00:09:41,123 --> 00:09:43,917 It's only four hours until my job interview. 139 00:09:44,126 --> 00:09:46,837 At least I'll be able to paint the circles out from under my eyes. 140 00:09:47,004 --> 00:09:49,673 I'm very sorry about all this, but you take such good care of me, 141 00:09:49,840 --> 00:09:51,550 I thought you could help take care of him. 142 00:09:51,758 --> 00:09:53,886 Yeah, I know, Mork. You always mean well. 143 00:09:54,094 --> 00:09:57,139 I'd do the same for anybody whose mother was kidnapped from the zoo. 144 00:09:57,347 --> 00:10:00,517 Well, I'm gonna go to bed now, and try and keep it quiet out here, will you? 145 00:10:04,271 --> 00:10:08,192 Well, since I'm up, I might as well see how my hair turned out. 146 00:10:12,529 --> 00:10:15,240 No! No. 147 00:10:15,407 --> 00:10:19,912 - Oh, no. - Cured his hiccups, Mind. Thanks. 148 00:10:20,078 --> 00:10:23,165 Mork, look at my hair. It's terrible. 149 00:10:23,373 --> 00:10:25,375 It's supposed to be blond, but it's green. 150 00:10:25,918 --> 00:10:28,295 Well, you're right, Mind. Instead of being short and sassy, 151 00:10:28,462 --> 00:10:32,716 - it's kind of short and grassy. - Oh, no. 152 00:10:32,925 --> 00:10:35,344 What a night. I didn't get any sleep, 153 00:10:35,511 --> 00:10:38,722 my hair is green, there's a monkey in my bed. 154 00:10:38,889 --> 00:10:41,350 Oh, I wish that darn chimp had never come here. 155 00:10:41,558 --> 00:10:45,020 - Oh, you don't mean that, Mind. - Oh, I don't know what I mean. 156 00:10:45,229 --> 00:10:47,064 It seems like ever since that monkey got here, 157 00:10:47,314 --> 00:10:49,107 everything's been going wrong. 158 00:10:49,316 --> 00:10:51,902 Oh, green hair? 159 00:10:52,069 --> 00:10:56,240 Oh, Mind, Mind, come on, now. I think you look terrific. 160 00:10:56,448 --> 00:11:00,202 I mean, you can always be like an Irish debutante. 161 00:11:01,578 --> 00:11:03,872 Or you can be like a punk prom queen. 162 00:11:04,081 --> 00:11:08,043 - Oh, Mork, cut it out. - Or you can be Miss Algae. 163 00:11:08,502 --> 00:11:09,628 Mind, come on, now. 164 00:11:09,837 --> 00:11:12,965 Wait. You could be like a good-time girl for a leprechaun. 165 00:11:22,015 --> 00:11:24,893 Well, I guess I wasn't meant to be a blond. 166 00:11:25,018 --> 00:11:26,812 I'll just have to buy some dye in the morning 167 00:11:27,062 --> 00:11:28,730 and change it back to my natural color. 168 00:11:28,939 --> 00:11:30,023 What, gopher brown? 169 00:11:30,732 --> 00:11:33,318 No, it's closer to woodchuck, I think. 170 00:11:33,819 --> 00:11:38,156 Anyway, I'm gonna go and see if I can rinse any more of this stuff out. 171 00:11:40,284 --> 00:11:42,578 - Mork, he's gone. - No, Mind, don't... 172 00:11:42,744 --> 00:11:45,122 - Doc? Doc? - Doc? Doc, Doc, Doc. 173 00:11:46,456 --> 00:11:50,210 Get in there, shorty, and no funny business. 174 00:11:57,676 --> 00:12:02,014 - Oh, Exidor, you found him. - Mork, thank goodness you're all right. 175 00:12:03,348 --> 00:12:05,475 You too, Mork. 176 00:12:06,435 --> 00:12:10,564 I just caught this burglar running from your house wearing your clothes. 177 00:12:10,772 --> 00:12:14,943 I had visions of you tied to a chair, wearing nothing but rope. 178 00:12:15,110 --> 00:12:17,446 Not a pretty picture. 179 00:12:17,613 --> 00:12:20,115 - He's not a burglar, though. - Oh, really? 180 00:12:20,282 --> 00:12:23,285 Then how do you explain this? 181 00:12:23,452 --> 00:12:26,872 My hunch is they're your family peanuts 182 00:12:27,122 --> 00:12:28,874 and he swiped them. 183 00:12:32,127 --> 00:12:35,923 Lucky for you, I'm your neighborhood vigilante. 184 00:12:36,089 --> 00:12:41,136 Boulder can sleep peacefully knowing Brutus and I are on patrol. 185 00:12:41,345 --> 00:12:43,639 - Brutus? - My Doberman. 186 00:12:43,805 --> 00:12:46,266 - Hello there. - I wouldn't touch him there. 187 00:12:48,393 --> 00:12:50,729 Well, I'm sure you two have a lot to talk about. 188 00:12:50,896 --> 00:12:52,773 I'm gonna take Doc into the bedroom. 189 00:12:52,940 --> 00:12:57,027 By the way, do you know your hair is green? 190 00:12:57,694 --> 00:12:58,820 Yes, I do. 191 00:12:59,029 --> 00:13:00,697 Did you lose a bet? 192 00:13:01,740 --> 00:13:04,743 - No. - I see. In that case: 193 00:13:10,040 --> 00:13:14,253 Mork, you're a fool. Don't you see what's going on right under your nose? 194 00:13:14,461 --> 00:13:15,712 What? Am I growing a mustache? 195 00:13:15,963 --> 00:13:20,175 You'll have to grow a lot more than that if you're gonna compete with him. 196 00:13:20,384 --> 00:13:23,428 Did you see the way she looked at him? 197 00:13:24,054 --> 00:13:26,098 Mork, they're in this together. 198 00:13:26,223 --> 00:13:29,017 They're gonna rob you blind and run off to Rio. 199 00:13:29,226 --> 00:13:31,562 Exidor, you don't understand, really. 200 00:13:31,728 --> 00:13:35,399 Has she ever carried you like that? Think about it. 201 00:13:35,607 --> 00:13:40,112 Brutus, heel. Heel, Brutus. Heel. 202 00:13:40,320 --> 00:13:44,366 Good dog. Good dog. Give me your paw. 203 00:13:44,533 --> 00:13:47,744 Give me a paw. No, no, the front one. 204 00:13:49,538 --> 00:13:51,373 Exidor, I don't think you really understand. 205 00:13:51,623 --> 00:13:54,168 You see, he's not an ex-con. He's not gonna run off with Mindy. 206 00:13:54,334 --> 00:13:56,378 - He's a friend of mine. - Clever disguise. 207 00:13:56,587 --> 00:13:58,922 You can't even see the zipper. 208 00:13:59,089 --> 00:14:01,466 Wait a minute. You see, his mother was kidnapped 209 00:14:01,675 --> 00:14:03,969 and I'm hiding him here till we find out where she is. 210 00:14:04,511 --> 00:14:06,013 Have you checked the pawn shops? 211 00:14:06,221 --> 00:14:08,932 Brutus, don't. Heel, heel. 212 00:14:09,099 --> 00:14:11,226 Good dog, good dog. 213 00:14:11,393 --> 00:14:13,312 No, no, you see, he came from the zoo. 214 00:14:13,478 --> 00:14:15,981 And I can't go there because they might recognize me, 215 00:14:16,148 --> 00:14:19,902 but, wait a minute, you can go because you'd be inconspicuous. 216 00:14:22,404 --> 00:14:27,159 That's true. Just another face in the crowd. 217 00:14:31,914 --> 00:14:36,084 Know when to hold them And know when to fold them 218 00:14:37,002 --> 00:14:38,795 All right, Doc, how many you want? 219 00:14:39,713 --> 00:14:43,133 None? Pretty cocky. 220 00:14:44,134 --> 00:14:47,679 Oh, okay. Yeah. I'll take four. 221 00:14:48,055 --> 00:14:53,143 Is that some sort of signal? One, two, four. 222 00:14:53,310 --> 00:14:55,812 Well, that fills my inside straight. 223 00:14:55,979 --> 00:14:59,149 Well, I call. What do you have? 224 00:15:01,443 --> 00:15:04,613 Well. Four aces, king high. That does kind of beat a 6. 225 00:15:06,532 --> 00:15:07,866 Just because you cleaned me out, 226 00:15:08,075 --> 00:15:10,911 I'm not gonna show you my centerfold of Jane Goodall now. 227 00:15:11,954 --> 00:15:14,790 Oh, somebody's at the door, Doc. Come on, go sit down over here. 228 00:15:14,998 --> 00:15:16,875 Here we go. You wait there for me. 229 00:15:17,084 --> 00:15:20,003 I'm not mad about losing, especially since it makes you forget your mom. 230 00:15:20,212 --> 00:15:22,631 I'll be right back. Don't worry. 231 00:15:25,217 --> 00:15:26,468 - Hey, Pops. - Hi, Mork. 232 00:15:26,635 --> 00:15:31,056 I brought over some of Mindy's old toys like you asked. 233 00:15:31,265 --> 00:15:33,267 So that's Doc. 234 00:15:33,475 --> 00:15:36,353 Yeah, that's the child that Fay Wray never talks about. 235 00:15:37,646 --> 00:15:41,942 You know, I've never been up real close to a chimpanzee before. 236 00:15:42,109 --> 00:15:43,610 Oh, don't worry. They won't hurt you. 237 00:15:43,777 --> 00:15:45,320 - Shake hands with him. - Shake hands? 238 00:15:45,529 --> 00:15:47,698 No, no, I don't think so. I have a rule. 239 00:15:47,865 --> 00:15:50,742 Never give a wild animal something you might want back. 240 00:15:50,868 --> 00:15:54,246 Oh, no, come on, come on, now. Here, watch this. 241 00:15:54,413 --> 00:15:57,791 Hey, shake hand. Yeah. 242 00:15:58,917 --> 00:16:00,252 You know, I think Mindy's right. 243 00:16:00,419 --> 00:16:02,337 - He should go back to the zoo. - Come on, now. 244 00:16:02,504 --> 00:16:04,506 You primates sit down and get to know each other. 245 00:16:04,673 --> 00:16:06,008 - No. - Come on, now. 246 00:16:06,175 --> 00:16:07,885 There you go. Relax. I'll be right back. 247 00:16:08,093 --> 00:16:10,304 I'm going to get a couple of bananas. Don't worry. 248 00:16:10,470 --> 00:16:12,139 You're not gonna leave me with this thing? 249 00:16:12,306 --> 00:16:14,308 Why? You won't hurt him. 250 00:16:27,905 --> 00:16:33,202 I'm going to talk to you in a kind voice and move very slowly. 251 00:16:35,204 --> 00:16:37,247 Look, I'm smiling. 252 00:16:39,291 --> 00:16:43,795 If you can understand, I like you a lot. 253 00:16:43,962 --> 00:16:46,173 I brake for animals. 254 00:16:49,301 --> 00:16:52,930 Hey, here's something you might like. Look. 255 00:16:53,764 --> 00:16:56,225 See this? This is a tricycle. Can you ride one? 256 00:16:56,391 --> 00:17:00,562 Well, maybe you can't, so I'll show you. 257 00:17:04,274 --> 00:17:05,859 Car break down again, Pops? 258 00:17:06,527 --> 00:17:12,032 No, I'm just making a fool out of myself for my very good friend. 259 00:17:12,241 --> 00:17:16,203 Well, bye, Mork, and have Mindy call me. 260 00:17:16,370 --> 00:17:19,581 Bye, pal, and thanks for sparing me. 261 00:17:19,748 --> 00:17:21,124 Hi there. 262 00:17:21,333 --> 00:17:24,336 Hello, Exidor. And goodbye. 263 00:17:26,839 --> 00:17:28,298 Nice guy. 264 00:17:28,924 --> 00:17:31,927 My dad used to walk backwards. 265 00:17:32,344 --> 00:17:34,096 - Know what stopped him? - No, what? 266 00:17:34,263 --> 00:17:36,682 '68 Pontiac. 267 00:17:39,434 --> 00:17:42,104 Well, what's the news? What did you find out about...? 268 00:17:42,771 --> 00:17:45,774 Excuse me. Ixnay, ixnay. Impchay amray understanderay. 269 00:17:47,317 --> 00:17:49,570 Doc, come on, time for a little nap nap. 270 00:17:49,778 --> 00:17:53,323 There we go. Wanna come up? Here we go, here we go. 271 00:17:53,490 --> 00:17:56,743 Don't you worry. I'll tell you that story again. 272 00:17:58,704 --> 00:18:01,290 All right, what's the news about his mother? 273 00:18:01,456 --> 00:18:06,795 - Sit down, I can take it, I can take it. - My first thought was white slavery. 274 00:18:07,713 --> 00:18:12,384 Then I figured, no, why sign up for that if I have to go look for a chimp? 275 00:18:13,302 --> 00:18:15,429 Then I ran into a keeper 276 00:18:15,596 --> 00:18:18,473 and he told me they'd rushed his mother to the zoo hospital. 277 00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:20,475 She wasn't kidnapped. She was in the hospital. 278 00:18:20,642 --> 00:18:23,145 - What was she in there for? - Well, I couldn't find out, 279 00:18:23,353 --> 00:18:25,105 except that it's serious. 280 00:18:25,272 --> 00:18:27,774 Oh, no. Oh, if it's serious, you gotta get there right away. 281 00:18:27,941 --> 00:18:30,777 - We've gotta take him too. - Hold it, Mork. 282 00:18:31,528 --> 00:18:34,406 There's a posse out looking for your fuzzy friend. 283 00:18:34,615 --> 00:18:37,701 It seems some fool kidnapped him. 284 00:18:45,375 --> 00:18:47,503 Coast is clear. 285 00:18:55,344 --> 00:19:00,098 You know, Mork, it's not easy sneaking a hot chimp back into a zoo. 286 00:19:00,265 --> 00:19:03,185 This is only the third time I've done it. 287 00:19:03,352 --> 00:19:05,771 The disguise worked because every time I call him Don Vito, 288 00:19:05,938 --> 00:19:08,190 no one bothered to question him. 289 00:19:09,816 --> 00:19:13,445 You know, hospitals give me the heebie-jeebies. 290 00:19:13,612 --> 00:19:16,657 That's why I quit the doctor biz. 291 00:19:17,699 --> 00:19:20,494 Let's see if anybody's home. 292 00:19:25,666 --> 00:19:27,084 I'm sorry, I can't talk right now. 293 00:19:27,292 --> 00:19:29,920 We're in the middle of some complicated surgery. 294 00:19:32,339 --> 00:19:34,550 Who was that masked man? 295 00:19:35,259 --> 00:19:38,720 An animal doctor who shaved off his fur. 296 00:19:39,888 --> 00:19:43,058 Exidor, I better talk to Doc alone. 297 00:19:45,769 --> 00:19:49,690 Doc, now, you and I have to have a man-to-simian talk for just a second. 298 00:19:49,857 --> 00:19:51,233 Yeah. 299 00:19:51,400 --> 00:19:54,111 You see, I don't know what's wrong with your mother in there, 300 00:19:54,278 --> 00:19:57,948 but if she doesn't get better, she's gonna go to a very special place. 301 00:19:58,156 --> 00:19:59,616 It's called animal heaven. 302 00:19:59,783 --> 00:20:02,995 Everything's wonderful up there, where bananas grow on clouds, 303 00:20:03,245 --> 00:20:05,289 and you can swing from anything you want. 304 00:20:05,414 --> 00:20:08,292 And Flicka's up there and Trigger and all three Lassies. 305 00:20:08,834 --> 00:20:10,752 You don't have to worry about anything, though. 306 00:20:10,919 --> 00:20:13,046 Yeah, I know you're worried, but, you see, 307 00:20:13,213 --> 00:20:16,925 you'll always have part of her to hold on to, and that's her love for you. 308 00:20:19,011 --> 00:20:21,513 You were waiting for...? Doc. 309 00:20:22,681 --> 00:20:25,058 The whole zoo's been looking for him. Where's he been? 310 00:20:25,225 --> 00:20:28,896 Well, he was in Boulder overnight. We brought him right back. 311 00:20:29,062 --> 00:20:31,440 Well, his mom's had a tough time, but she's all right now. 312 00:20:31,607 --> 00:20:34,860 - Come on, Doc. - Hey, goodbye, little fella. 313 00:20:35,027 --> 00:20:37,487 Thanks very much and take care. 314 00:20:37,654 --> 00:20:40,782 Oh, I got a surprise for you. 315 00:20:41,366 --> 00:20:43,327 I'm gonna take you back to your mama. 316 00:20:43,494 --> 00:20:47,164 Come on. Come on, come on. 317 00:20:47,915 --> 00:20:50,626 Oh, I'm gonna miss that little guy. 318 00:20:55,464 --> 00:20:57,716 I'd like you to meet Doc's new baby brother. 319 00:20:57,883 --> 00:21:00,093 Baby brother? 320 00:21:00,344 --> 00:21:02,596 So that's why his mom was in the hospital. 321 00:21:05,641 --> 00:21:07,851 Oh, look at that. 322 00:21:08,352 --> 00:21:11,146 Look at that, he's got his brother's knuckles. 323 00:21:11,522 --> 00:21:14,316 And he's got Charles Bronson's chin. 324 00:21:14,816 --> 00:21:18,237 Thanks for getting Doc back to us. Now the whole family can be together. 325 00:21:18,403 --> 00:21:21,740 No sweat. Hey, take care, little: 326 00:21:24,618 --> 00:21:28,497 It's a boy. It's a boy. Have a cigar. Don't mind if I do. 327 00:21:31,792 --> 00:21:33,085 It's a baby boy. 328 00:21:33,252 --> 00:21:35,003 Yeah, wait a sec. 329 00:21:35,170 --> 00:21:38,048 Hold on, I didn't mean to wake you up. I'm sorry. Don't... 330 00:21:46,473 --> 00:21:48,767 No, Glenda Faye, somebody else got it. 331 00:21:48,976 --> 00:21:51,436 Thanks for your help, but next time I go on a job interview, 332 00:21:51,603 --> 00:21:53,438 it's gonna be with my own hair. 333 00:21:53,605 --> 00:21:56,400 Yeah. Okay, I'll talk to you real soon. 334 00:21:56,567 --> 00:21:58,318 Okay, bye. 335 00:21:58,527 --> 00:22:01,405 - Oh, shazbot, I lost. - What are you doing? 336 00:22:01,530 --> 00:22:04,491 Playing strip solitaire, and I'm losing fast. 337 00:22:06,076 --> 00:22:07,494 Oh, so anyway, finish your story. 338 00:22:07,619 --> 00:22:10,247 You didn't get in trouble or anything when you brought Doc back? 339 00:22:10,414 --> 00:22:13,584 No, I just told them I found him. The problem is I didn't tell them where. 340 00:22:13,792 --> 00:22:16,295 I guess everything turned out for the best. I got my hair back 341 00:22:16,461 --> 00:22:19,923 - and Doc's back with his family. - Yeah. It's a good thing too, 342 00:22:20,090 --> 00:22:23,051 but you know something, Mind? I really miss that little guy. 343 00:22:23,260 --> 00:22:24,761 You know: 344 00:22:26,263 --> 00:22:28,640 You know, Mind, I've been thinking, maybe we could... 345 00:22:28,891 --> 00:22:30,559 Don't do this to me, Mork. 346 00:22:31,393 --> 00:22:32,477 Mind, you're right. 347 00:22:32,644 --> 00:22:34,980 I'll never spring another animal from the zoo, I promise. 348 00:22:35,147 --> 00:22:37,149 I mean, this Orkan has learned his lesson. 349 00:22:51,371 --> 00:22:53,790 He must have answered the ad, Mind. 350 00:22:54,416 --> 00:22:57,127 Let me show you upstairs. This is where you're going for your room. 351 00:23:08,055 --> 00:23:10,682 Mork calling Orson. Come in, Orson. 352 00:23:10,891 --> 00:23:15,854 Mork calling Orson. Come in, Orson. 353 00:23:17,272 --> 00:23:20,317 Mork calling Orson. Come in, oh, Victor Huge-O. 354 00:23:20,484 --> 00:23:22,319 That's not my name. 355 00:23:22,486 --> 00:23:24,404 Well, I'll cut the fat and get to the meat. 356 00:23:24,571 --> 00:23:27,950 This week, sir, my report is on the status of animals on Earth. 357 00:23:28,158 --> 00:23:30,369 I assume they're the respected elite? 358 00:23:30,536 --> 00:23:31,912 Oh, no, sir, that's only on Ork, 359 00:23:32,079 --> 00:23:34,039 according to the decree by Prime Minister Fluffy. 360 00:23:34,206 --> 00:23:35,707 But some animals have it very good. 361 00:23:35,874 --> 00:23:38,293 They're called pets, just like Beebs here. Right, Beebs? 362 00:23:38,502 --> 00:23:40,087 Yeah, yeah, you know how that is. 363 00:23:40,546 --> 00:23:41,588 They have it great. 364 00:23:41,755 --> 00:23:43,757 Room and board, their dish with a name on it, 365 00:23:43,924 --> 00:23:45,425 and all the newspapers they can read. 366 00:23:45,592 --> 00:23:47,719 Do all animals on Earth live this way? 367 00:23:47,886 --> 00:23:51,139 Well, no, sir. Some live in places called zoos, where they're protected. 368 00:23:51,390 --> 00:23:54,142 Do any animals roam free in their natural environment? 369 00:23:54,351 --> 00:23:56,270 Yes, sir, but they're called game. 370 00:23:56,520 --> 00:23:58,689 Sir, I wonder how much fun the game would be, though, 371 00:23:58,856 --> 00:24:00,858 if the animals were the ones with the rifles. 372 00:24:01,024 --> 00:24:02,276 - Tell me, Mork. - Sir. 373 00:24:02,484 --> 00:24:06,113 Do you think animals will ever reach the status they have on Ork? 374 00:24:06,280 --> 00:24:09,533 Well, sir, I have faith. But it'll take some time. 375 00:24:09,741 --> 00:24:12,411 I know that there are some humans who love and understand animals, 376 00:24:12,578 --> 00:24:14,621 and realize that all living things have feelings, 377 00:24:14,872 --> 00:24:17,249 even though they don't have the words to express them. 378 00:24:17,416 --> 00:24:19,710 And on that happy note, sir, I say good night. 379 00:24:19,918 --> 00:24:22,713 In the words of my friend, Doc the chimp: 380 00:24:26,466 --> 00:24:29,803 Which means, na-no, na-no, sir. Until next week.